Status Update

It is a tumultuous time we live in. Our Nation is embroiled in gun, marriage and reproductive rights debates and battles. We still face racial prejuidice and inequality as the events in Ferguson have so brightly shined a spotlight on issues that have been lurking in the shadows for years and exist in all facets of our society.

Good lord if I can’t have a cup of coffee in the morning and scroll through my Facebook feed or peruse my favorite news homepage without feeling bombarded with it all! Half of our Country is angry as hell about who is leading this Nation, half the country wants to “legalize it” and a good majority just want to see Tebow get a fair shot at quarterback or see if a certian team can win The Super Bowl with a properly inflated football.

We are torn apart and turned around in all different directions; most of the time unsure which end is up.

Our society is all about debating, scrutinizing, judging and most of all fervently disagreeing with one another. Every news program, reality television show and online forum attests to this truth. For each person who stands for something there is someone else who will stand against it. For instance, when I am out having coffee with a group of friends who may even agree on a certain subject there is always one or two people that can’t help playing the devil’s advocate just to keep the conversation “spicy”.

It can be fun, it can make us feel empowered, we can even learn something from it, but if conflict and disagreement is all we ever do than in the end all we really are is distracted. We are being distracted from the things that deep down really matter.

I admit that over the past few years I have been distracted myself and spent too much time being angry with certian politics, certian churches (Westboro Baptist) and a certain chicken sandwich franchise everyone was divided upon supporting. And every year I devote too much of my valuable time reading articles and box scores of my favorite baseball team from the North Side of Chicago (although I do consider it a long term investment).

We all have worries and wants, passions and perspectives, convictions and concerns. There are things that we all believe are worthy to stand for, fight for and we should. However, although some of these social and political issues are truly important I can’t help but believe that we often are caught in a kind of tunnel vision, so focused on the things we are passionate about and yet missing the point, the bigger picture.

Currently that means that many people are afraid that our right to bare arms to protect ourselves and keep the government honest is being threatened. Yet I have to wonder if our Government is remotely concerned with a population so preoccupied by social networking sites, television, smart phones and celebrity worship? The majority of America has no idea what is really going on because we are too busy playing Trivia Crack on their mobile device.

The Government already has us right where it wants us, distracted. We are like those videos on YouTube of people caught on surveillance video walking into bears (seriously?) or falling into fountains because they are so busy texting and not paying attention to where they are going.  

Others are concerned with the dangers of legalizing medical marijuana yet they don’t even question the fact that people are prescribed chemically created and engineered medications (from Pharmaceutical companies who line our politicians pockets with kickbacks) that have quickly become our nations most abused, dangerous and deadly drugs.

People rant and rave about our Nation’s health care system, as we stuff our faces with Big Macs, drink Carmel Macchiatos with extra syrup and allow our Gym memberships to lapse.

Everyone is concerned with Government spending and our Countries ever increasing debt and yet when it comes to our own personal finances we spend and borrow in excess without saving a dime while simultaneously botching our checkbooks and failing to even put together a budget.

Many people fight to protect traditional marriage from “alternative lifestyles” yet we do very little to strengthen or even protect the marriages we already have.

We complain about Government yet we don’t vote in local elections or even attend PTA meetings of the schools our children attend.

I witness all of this transpiring in society at large but sadly I see similarities of this happening within my faith and church as well.

It is no secret that the Church has fractured apart into so many little cliques and disgruntled family members throughout our cities and towns that we can hardly keep count. Sometimes it happens because of deep theological differences and sometimes it happens because someone made a negative comment about someone else’s homemade potato salad at the church potluck.

We fight incisively about who will get into heaven or if there even is a literal hell as people suffer and live in "hell" all around us every day

We squabble over correct interpretations and versions of the Bible that only serve to collect dust on shelves of believers anyways instead of being thankful people are inspired to read it no matter the language used.

We spend time and money on seminars, books and meetings so our churches can be more “hip” and “relevant”, while people who live outside the four-walls of church live every day with their own relevant concerns, hurts and needs.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying our convictions, feelings and beliefs are unimportant or even all wrong. However, we cannot allow ourselves to become stagnant or useless because we are paralyzed by a certain issue or concern. And that is my whole point here. So often we only get passionate about the headlines, the highlighted content, the Tweets, the juicy sound bites and we ignore the whole content of the story, the sources, the consequences

We see this every election year. Many people became so troubled, so focus on a handful of issues and political candidates while ignoring a world of more pressing ones. The world doesn't stop turning so we can focus all of our energies on politics and winning. People were still going hungry, wars still raged, marriages were falling apart and children were still abused.

We can’t allow ourselves to become like the futuristic people prophesied about in the Pixar movie WALL-E who lay around all day in a hover/wheel chair with computer screens in front of them and Slurpee’s in their cup holders. They were so overfed and distracted that they become a useless people that lacked the muscle tone to even stand up.

My challenge to us all (for sure myself included) is to branch out and broaden our horizons. Volunteer at a soup kitchen, mow your neighbor’s lawn or have a cup of coffee with a friend.

Read a book, watch a documentary or have a conversation with someone that challenges rather that validates your beliefs.

Say a prayer (instead of complain) for those who lead you whether it be a boss, a pastor or yes, even the President.

Speak life rather than death. SPEAK LIFE RATHER THAN DEATH!

Be optimistic…yeah, in this world we will have troubles, but if you’re someone who professes faith like I do than remember that Jesus took care of it so you don’t have too! All of our concerns, worries and fears accomplish NOTHING; put your hope in the one who accomplished everything!

Heck, take a picture of your kids, an awe-inspiring sunset or even the incredibly tantalizing food that has been placed in front of you and upload it via Twitter or Facebook every once in awhile. Then at the very least the rest of us will know that you are getting out of the house and doing something.

Most of all, as the Apostle Paul encouraged, “set your mind on things above!”

Why are you wearing that silly human suit?

The reflection in the mirror is not overly attractive nor is it familiar. My usual strategy of retreat has been aborted despite the sirens blaring in my head. On this occasion I can't break eye contact. I have to look. I have to peer into his eyes and deeper still into the windows of his soul. Some twenty years have passed and to my embarrassment I have to admit to myself that I don't know him at all.

I have let so much time pass, yet at last we are getting acquainted. He is a pretty good guy after all, much kinder than I was led to believe. Sure he has his moments. For example, the other day when he lost his patience with everyone at work and just started acting like a jerk…complaining about everything and acting self-righteous. Oh…or how about a few weeks back when he sat around with a buddy saying some pretty cold things about a friend behind their back. Totally uncalled for. But you have to forgive him, he defiantly is far from perfect and but for the most part he is a good person. He loves his family, works hard and is a loyal friend.

I have to say it feels pretty good now that I'm getting to know myself a little better. I really did ignore me for so long. I guess in my experience the act I put on can be traced back to Sunday school. I was taught how a good boy was suppose to be, what I was and wasn't supposed to say and do. I was an astute kid anyways, I didn't really have to be taught it, I just had to watch the actions of all the adults around me, squirming in their pews, putting on fake smiles and trying to hold it all together until they could get to the car and have a cigarette.

I don't blame the church so much anymore. I realize we all try to be something or someone we are not, whether we were raised a Christian, Catholic, a banker's son or a teacher's daughter, middle class, or whatever. Whether we do it to please someone else or ourselves it is too exhausting trying to hold up appearances, to pretend, and to live a lie. What follows are some truths I have come to learn from, hold too and attempt to live by. Hopefully truths that will encourage you to gaze in the mirror and face yourself.

At times I, and maybe you have experienced this too, have struggle with the lie that God is not happy with the person I am. Now don't get the person I am and the life I am living confused. God will always love me the person, but won't always love the life I have chosen to live. Make sense? Sometimes in my self-loathing, pity party of a life I have these glimpses of the truth that God created me to be the person I am and he is happy with that. I think I disrespect Him in a way when I am unhappy about my life, my mistakes and even myself and continually compare myself to everyone else.

Although God loves us as we are that is not a license to be complacent. We should always strive to be better people and improve ourselves. But beware of self-help books! In my quest I have found that I'm not a big fan of books that promise some kind of life change in 7 easy steps. The titles are endless, the promises sound too good to be true and the results are almost guaranteed. Yes, maybe it took only 5 steps for the author to become financially secure or 10 steps for a person to forgive, but just because that approach worked for one person doesn't mean that it will work for anyone else.

Our relationship with God is said to be a personal one and God works in our lives in individual ways. If this is true than I don't want God to deal with me in a cookie cutter way that he used with someone else. I am a different person, with different feelings and needs. Fortunately God already knows this about me. He knows that it may take me 20 steps when it takes others only three. Yet he is patient with me because he knows me. He knows how to get lasting results and what I must go through to achieve them. Of course we might not always like how God chooses to mold our lives, instruct our minds or mature our souls. It can be the most painful time of our lives.

I have always liked the Bible passage that says "God turns all things to good for those who trust in Him". I don't fully understand it but I do believe it because sometimes it is all I have to hold onto. When life turns sour or things go wrong it is something I have to hold tight too and say, "Somehow God is going to use this for good". I admit there have been moments in my life where I have not seen these results as of yet. Although there isn't much sign of any good coming of it, I am still weakly holding on to Gods promise that something good will come from the tragedy or failure.

Dark secrets, shame, regrets and failure are things we all face in life. We either react by bury them or facing them. We can spend our whole lives hung up on a mistake we have made or even spend years in regret. There is nothing that can be done to erase a mistake, forget a failure or hide a sin. There is no way to turn back time and change things. Although there are things that stay with us, taunt us, mock us and maybe even hold us back, we have to take a positive view of it somehow. We learn from our mistakes no matter how painful they are.

Failure has the potential to make us stronger. Failure molds our character. I know there aren't many of us that would choose to go out and make a mess of life so they could learn from it and I'm not suggesting anyone should, that is just foolish. What I am saying is that if you have already made a mistake, or error than let it go. God is so much more merciful and forgiving than we are taught in church. He forgives you but the thing is you have to forgive yourself. God can turn our defeats into something positive. We need hide no longer.

We keep our failures chained and locked in the basement of our souls. Hidden from the world, but slowly it is rotting us away from the inside out. We bury our own dreams to please those around us, living a life that will never bring us happiness. We hold our tongue to keep a peace that we only imagine still exists. In the process we have lost our identity. We become someone we hardly recognize, maybe even someone we hate.

I have tried to please the world around me and I admit sometimes I still do. I was a seeker of a blessing from the church and at times I persist in my longing to be smiled upon. At my worse I have betrayed my very self. I traded the things I believe in to carry their membership card. To make it quite simple I lived a lie and I have to continue to guard myself from living a life that is not my own.

Every part of life can define who we are right now. We cannot erase any moment no matter how painful, hurtful, or damaging it was. We cannot and should not pretend that tragedy never stuck. We can choose however, how we approach those moments. What we take with us from them, what we learned and how we live because of those moments.

It is time to step out of the skin we have been hiding inside. It is time to look in the mirror and face ourselves.

Don't forget you're beautiful
Just the way you are
Change for you and not for me
I like who you are
DUg Pinnick singing "Beautiful"