I have brainstormed tirelessly trying to come up with some
cute way to intro into this topic. Usually when I sit down to write I have
already conceived some clever opening in which I can then build the whole essay
around. However, this issue is too critical and pressing, there seems no
painless way to ease into the subject matter. Its uncomfortable, controversial,
and passionately debated, being as it is the “hot button” topic of our day. It
is the LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bi and Transgender) people, community or lifestyle. When you throw faith into the equation, much like water and oil, cats and
dogs, it seems an awkward and perhaps impossible mix.
Can I be honest and say that I’m no expert on this topic.
What follows is simply my opinions and insights gleaned from my experiences in
life and faith, as well as from my friendships with gays and lesbians. All I
can say for sure from my safe vantage point within the “four walls” of
Christianity is that I feel uncomfortable by what I have witnessed so far in my
life in regards to Christianity and its interaction with people from the LGBT
community. I have heard so many sermons and
read enough “religious” books and scripture to know how God feels about his
creation, about justice, about mercy and grace and about treating our fellow
human beings with respect. I believe that Christians have made numerous
irreversible mistakes in relation to LGBT's. We have been ugly, hateful,
vengeful, unmerciful, judgmental and unloving to the gay and lesbian
communities. We have not represented the love and mercy of our God very well
and for that I am sorry and I live my life in such a way as to make
amends.
As the nation continues to go to the polls to decide the
fate of gay rights and as gay, lesbian and religious organizations draw up
their battle plans, it’s easy to see that these issues are not going anywhere
in the near future. I believe that Christianity finds itself in a place and
time of great responsibility and opportunity to minister to the LGBT
communities, however I am afraid that we are missing this incredible chance to
represent the love and grace of God. I fear that many within Christianity are
so focused on the cultural and political war being fought regarding “gay
rights”, that we are alienating ourselves from people who deserve to be loved,
respected and cared for whether we agree with their lifestyles or not. These
are human beings who deserve to receive the same message of hope, redemption
and forgiveness that I did. No one should be excluded from those opportunities,
however I wonder if the “Vote Yes on Prop 102” signs that support banning
same-sex marriage in front of our churches send them a different message.
If Christianity sincerely wishes to reach out to gays and
lesbians than I believe that somehow the culture and mindset of the church and
its believers will have to change. First of all, the doors of our churches must
be open to all “seekers” without prejudice, expectation or judgment. It should
be a safe and welcoming place where people who are foreign to the gospel and
the Christian faith can “taste and see that the Lord is good”, experiencing a
relationship with God at their own pace even if it take weeks, months or even
years to come to faith.
As believers we need to exercise some patients towards
those who are in a place of pondering questions about faith. There is this
expectation that people should walk into the doors of the church and
immediately make a decision whether they will accept or reject the whole
“Christian package”. The whole idea that we can hold isolated “evangelistic
services” that cater to outsiders and focuses on getting them saved, plugged
into the church and turned from all their sins that very day is unrealistic. We
have to allow space for God to reveal himself to them, while our responsibility
is to patiently represent God to them with love, while assisting in nurturing
their faith. In our fast paced, drive-thru, high-speed everything world, this
can be challenging. But a true, enduring, mature faith takes time to cultivate.
Furthermore, I have noticed that the church often has an
underlying, unspoken yet tangible sense that everyone who enters is guilty
until proven innocent. The truth is that everyone is unworthy, everyone
has fallen short, there is no one who is righteous, yet God patiently
offers everyone His favor which we are criminally undeserving of. We
must keep in mind that it is God’s spirit that convicts people of their sins
and not our bullhorns, protest signs or political agendas. We need to trust God
enough to do His job within the hearts and lives of people and not intervene
impatiently or without love. Scripture shares an important insight into the
Character of God as “patient with (us), not wishing that any should perish”.
That will probably mean we are going to be a little uncomfortable at times as
God deals with the real issues in people’s hearts and we are left to tolerate
and witness their “symptoms”. David Kinniman writes in Unchristian, “If we
allow the actions and attitudes of outsiders to shock us, we become either
isolationists or crusaders, and neither extreme will have much influence on
outsiders”. How true and yet tragic this statement is.
Scripture is full of brilliant, yet often ignored examples
for us to follow. Take Romans 2:4 for instance; “do you show contempt for the
riches of His kindness, tolerance and patience, not realizing that God’s
kindness leads you toward repentance?” When God deals with us He is kind,
tolerant and patient. Unfortunately Christians do not often display these same
characteristics in their interactions with others. God tolerates our
transgressions and sins, and then we turn around and are offended by the sins
of others. He is patient but we are “tired of wickedness of our
generation”. He is kind, but we lash out in sarcasm, anger and disgust.
As Christians God constantly extends to us His grace, mercy and forgiveness as
we constantly lay ruin to any sign of righteousness we might have. God does
this not only out of an unfathomable love for his creation, but also as an
example for us to live by.
If we as Christians are serious about loving the gay community than I plead
that we drop the insensitive jokes, the untruths, misinformation and the
stereotypes about homosexuals. Well we are at it, if we feel a strong
conviction to fight for traditional marriage than that is fine, but let’s come
up with a better argument than claiming we are “protecting the sanctity of
marriage” by attempting to bar same sex marriages. We heterosexuals have done a
fine enough job destroying the sacredness of marriage, trampling on its
sanctity with divorce and infidelity that is just as prevalent within the
church than it is in the world of “heathens”.
I
consider myself blessed to have grown up in the Christian faith and church.
When I think of the church what comes to mind are second rate horror movies in
which people who are chased by either monsters, zombies or knife wielding
psychopaths who are attempting to “hack them to pieces”, narrowly escape to the
refuge of some peaceful, gothic looking church. Perhaps a better example is the
far too familiar scenes from CNN following terrible storms and hurricanes, in
which displaced families huddled together in the safety of a churches holy
sanctuary, which has become a Red Cross evacuation center.
Too often Christian people who have “come out” have quickly
been shown the door or have been shunned in shame by their old friends who
simply didn’t know how to respond. Something seems terribly wrong when people
are sent packing from a supposed loving, caring, community of believers. As the
church opens its doors to victims of natural disasters, I believe it should
also open its doors to all people who are in need spiritually. What better
place for people to be than in the house of a loving, caring God where
redemption and healing take place.
TO BE CONTINUED...
“Love covers over a multitude of sins”
1 Peter 4:8
“Christians are primarily perceived for what they stand
against. We have become famous for what we oppose, rather than who we are for”.
David Kinniman
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